My Year in Review [9/2011-9/2012]

09.16.12

It was last September when my journey began. It started as tronchanteric bursitis [inflammation] and quickly escalated to bone deterioration in my hips and shoulders from a lack of blood supply [Avascular Necrosis]. It all happened so quickly that I didn't have much time to think.

I only knew that I needed to act. I needed to get better.

After my hip pain started in my left hip, the rest of my story came hard and fast. It wasn't just my bones in my hips deteriorating, causing me to have a severe limp which kept me off of my feet most days -- it was also my right shoulder ... not being able to use it ... not being able to lift my children and my youngest son, who was barely seven-months-old when I started seeing doctors.

It was also learning to deal with life in a wheelchair, losing my independence, recovering from surgeries, dealing with doctors who didn't understand what was happening to me, becoming a pin cushion for dozens of lab tests, lying there time after time for x-rays and MRIs, and through it all -- waiting as patiently as possible for good news.

But it seemed that the good news never came. It kept getting worse. I also developed an autoimmune condition, I was anemic, I was weak, my blood was clotting, surgeries were necessary, I had severe chest pains that kept me awake in fear at night, and worst of all, I didn't have any answers about why this all was happening.

They kept calling my case "idiopathic," meaning they didn't know the cause.

On my really bad days, I had convinced myself that I was dying.

I kept working full-time through it all -- only taking one week off after each surgery and then working from home for a few days until I was able to physically be back in the office. I still had three children who deserved my love and attention. And I still needed to be a wife and maintain a household. Though my life was changing so drastically, the world just kept moving along at a chaotic pace.

With four surgeries behind me, including one hip replacement, I can finally say that things are getting better. I'm walking again, though I have to limit my time on my feet. I'm lifting my children again, though not easily. I'm still piecing together my own complex pieces of the puzzle that caused this all to happen.

In hindsight, I still wonder how I made it through the past year without falling apart [literally & figuratively].

I was watching a T.V. show [Sons of Anarchy] last week and heard this quote:

"There's an old saying 'that which doesn't kill you makes you stronger', I don't believe that. I think the things that try to kill you make you angry and sad. Strength comes from the good things; your family, your friends the satisfaction of hard work. Those are the things that will keep you whole. Those are the things to hold on to when you're broken."
He was right. I was angry and sad. Sometimes, I still am. But I survived and gathered strength from family, friends, my choice to continue working, and my faith. Those are the things that I have held onto through the past year. Those are the things that got me through.

I'm still learning more about my health -- like a possible clotting disorder that I developed. The doctor who administered the tests said that it is likely that my clotting issues were brought on by the manufactured hormones used in Mirena (IUD). It appears that the clotting has ceased since I had Mirena removed. I'll be writing more about this in a future post.

I love being able to read back through my blog from beginning to now -- it reminds me of how far I have come and how much I have overcome and, most of all, how much I have to be thankful for. The past year hasn't been easy by any stretch of the word, but it has taught me a lot about myself, and about life and the people in it.

Every morning that I can wake up and live is a gift. And every small step towards getting better is a blessing. The bad news may have come hard and fast one year ago this month, but within the past two months -- I've started to get some good news, too.

Here is a breakdown of all of my medical services [except for dental], in alphabetical order, for the past year [with the most important one of all in bold letters]:

ADRENALIN EPINEPHRINE INJECT 1 time
ANGIOTENSIN ENZYME TEST 1 time
ANTINUCLEAR ANTIBODIES, RIA 3 times
ASSAY BLOOD MAGNESIUM 1 time
ASSAY BLOOD PHOSPHORUS 1 time
ASSAY BLOOD URIC ACID 1 time
ASSAY CPK IN BLOOD 1 time
ASSAY THYROID STIM HORMONE 1 time
ASSAY THYROID STIM HORMONE 1 time
AUTOMAT HEMOGRAM-COMPLET DIF 6 times
AUTOMAT HEMOGRAM-COMPLET DIF 1 time
AUTOMAT HEMOGRAM-COMPLET DIF 3 times
BILIRUBIN DIRECT 1 time
BLOOD VISCOSITY EXAMINATION 1 time
C-REACTIVE PROTEIN 2 times
C-REACTIVE PROTEIN 2 times
COLLECTION OF VENOUS BLOOD 1 time
COLLECTION OF VENOUS BLOOD 1 time
COLUMN CHROMOTOGRAPHY QUANT 1 time
COLUMN CHROMOTOGRAPHY QUANT 1 time
COMP TST,EA.UN,SPIN TECH 1 time
COMPLEMENT; TOTAL (CH 50) 1 time
COMPREHEN METABOLIC PANEL 1 time
COMPREHEN METABOLIC PANEL 2 times
CONSULTATIONS 1 time
CONSULTATIONS 1 time
COOMBS TEST 1 time
CULTURE SCREEN ONLY 1 time
CYCLIC CITRULLINATED 2 times
DNA ANTIBODY 2 times
FIXATION OF SHOULDER 1 time
FIXATION OF SHOULDER 1 time
GAIT TRAINING THERAPY 2 times
HEMATOCRIT 2 times
HEMATOLOGY AND COAGULATION 2 times
HEMATOLOGY AND COAGULATION 3 times
HEMOGLOBIN, COLORIMETRIC 2 times
HHCP-SERV OF PT,EA 15 MIN 4 times
HIP CORE DECOMPRESSION 1 time
HOSPITAL BED, SEIMI-ELECTRIC 1 time
HOSPITAL OBSERVATION PER HR 1 time
IMMUNOASSAY, NONANTIBODY 1 time
IMMUNOFIXATION ELECTROPHORES 1 time
IMMUNOLOGY 2 times
INJECT/DRAIN JOINT/BURSA 3 2 times
INJECTION FOR NERVE BLOC 8 1 time
MEDICAL SERVICES 1 time
METABOLIC PANEL TOTAL CA 4 times
METHYLPREDNISO ACET 40MG/4MX 1 time
MIDAZOLAM HCL PER 1MG/49 MX 2 times
MISCELLANEOUS SERVICES 3 times
MISCELLANEOUS SERVICES 4 times
MISCELLANEOUS SERVICES 19 times
MOLECULAR DIAG;INT OF REPORT 1 time
MOLECULAR DIAGNOSTIC 1 time
MOLECULAR DIAGNOSTICS 1 time
MOLECULE ISOLATE NUCLEIC 1 time
MOLECULE MUTATION SCAN 1 time
MORPHIN SULF UPTO 10MG/192MX 1 time
MRI; ANY UPPER EXTREMITY JNT 1 time
MRI; ANY UPPER EXTREMITY JNT 1 time
MRI; ANY UPPER EXTREMITY JNT 1 time
MRI; ANY UPPER EXTREMITY JNT 1 time
N BLOCK INJ, LUMBAR PLEXUS 1 time
NUCLEAR ANTIGEN ANTIBODY 2 times
NUCLEAR SCAN OF SKELETON 1 time
NUCLEAR SCAN OF SKELETON 1 time
OFFICE VISIT 1 time
OFFICE VISIT 2 times
OFFICE VISIT 2 times
OFFICE VISIT 2 times
PART REMOVAL HIP BONE DEEP 2 times
PROT; ELEC-PHORE FRACTIONATI 1 time
PROTHROMBIN TIME 2 times
PT EVALUATION 2 times
RBC SED RATE, AUTO 2 times
RBC SED RATE, AUTO 3 times
REMOVAL OF HUMERUS LESION 1 time
REMOVE HUMERUS LESION 1 time
REMOVE INTRAUTERINE DEVICE 1 time
RIA ASSAY OF PARATHORMONE 1 time
RIA ASSAY OF PARATHORMONE 1 time
STANDARD WHEELCHAIR 8 times
STREP A ASSAY W/OPTIC 1 time
TC99M MEDRONATE 1 time
THERAPEUTIC EXERCISES 5 times
THROMBOPLASTIN TIME, PARTIAL 2 times
TOTAL HIP ARTHROPLASTY 1 time
URINALYSIS WITH MICROSCOPY 1 time
URINALYSIS, AUTO. W/SCOPE 1 time
URINE CULTURE, COLONY COUNT 1 time
UV-ASSAY BLOOD LDH ENZYME 1 time
VITAMIN D, 25 HYDROXY 1 time
X-RAY EXAM OF HIP 1 time
X-RAY EXAM OF HIP 1 time
X-RAY EXAM OF HIP 1 time
X-RAY EXAM OF HIP 3 times
X-RAY EXAM OF HIP 1 time
X-RAY EXAM OF HIP 1 time
X-RAY EXAM OF PELVIS 1 time
X-RAY EXAM OF PELVIS 2 times
X-RAY EXAM OF PELVIS 2 times
X-RAY EXAM OF SHOULDER 1 time
X-RAY EXAM OF SHOULDER 1 time
X-RAY EXAM OF SHOULDER 1 time
X-RAY EXAM OF SHOULDER 1 time

That's a long list, right? It costs me an arm and two legs :-)

"For God has not given us a spirit of timidity, but of power and love and discipline." -- 2 Timothy 1:7

Amen.